Jesus, Jesus let me tell you how I feel, you have given me your spirit, I love you so!
Today, as I mentally prepared for Ginger`s moms funeral tomorrow, I was overwhelmed with extreme sadness and overpowering tears and grief. Perhaps attending three funerals, in just one week has taken a tremendous toll on my emotional output. Is this overload, what the Holy Spirit was preparing me for on Easter Sunday, when I felt His directions to pray?
Job 32:8 But it is the spirit in a man, the breath of the Almighty, that gives him understanding.
Today in church, as the worship team sang songs of praise and glory to God, the water works began to flow, actually it became more of a flood, maybe even a tsunami. As I held my hands high in the air, in honor of God, the words were hampered by uncontrollable tears, Thoughts of making an exit were replaced with Godly comfort and confidence that embraced my soul. Thank God ,I had plenty of tissues. I was touched by the Body of Christ as friends reached out with hugs and supportive prayers.
The celebrations of Mother`s Day added insult to injury. Memories of my own mother surfaced, only to be replaced, by pain and empathy that I felt for Ginger and her siblings. For me, the death of my mother was one of the most difficult times of my life. The dynamics of our family has forever changed; ushering me and siblings into the oldest generation. An unwelcomed position that required time to sink-in! These same feelings will surface, as I bid farewell to Ginger`s mom tomorrow, laying to rest decades of childhood memories and a generation of love and friendship.
I pray that I will be restored and refreshed so that I can offer love and support of the entire Foley family tomorrow. Tonight, as I was sitting in my favorite green chair praying to God, a movie came on TV. "The Passion of the Christ," really God, more tears, but a feeling of love and renewal and the ability to write this message! Thank you, God.
More prayers and a good night`s sleep will work wonders, thank you in advance, Father God! Amen.
Psalm 18:32-33 It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he enables me to stand on the heights.
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